Entwine the ribbons,
lace them loosely
up
If leaves fell slowly
up
to attach themselves
to live again,
the points and beats
she hid stuffed
down
like bullets in the back
would cascade axe
and sledgehammer
happiness
with drink,
with smile reflector,
with bothersome empty words,
and dumbshow deeds
She was sad from birth
Beautiful, true in a raw and painful way. I hurt for you.
LikeLike
Thank you, Gwenyth. Listening to The Shins lately; their music helps.
LikeLike
I like the idea of leaves falling upward but it’s probably a good thing they don’t. They’d probably take us with them and we’d be trapped in the trees forever unable to move.
LikeLike
Thank you. Trapped in the trees, back to the early days. I used to really like treehouses.
LikeLike
it could be cheap rent
LikeLike
That’s an f-ing good treehouse. You think it’s wired for electricity?
LikeLike
This one Shawn, is why I have to click only three or four stars for some of yr work even though u consistently produce stuff we know ought to be hardbound for sale in whatever bookstores are left. This one needs the headroom, more than 5 Drive-by shooting stars, that might communicate the tragedy of what it takes to make something like this.
With sledgehammer happiness,
The Lying Lion
LikeLike
Thank you.
LikeLike
‘She was sad from birth.’ : ( Kills me.
LikeLike
Me too.
LikeLike
super lovely…
LikeLike
Thanks, Jingle! You’re super lovely.
LikeLike
pain in voice, beauty in poem 🙂
LikeLike
Thank you. It’s good to see beauty, even in the painful.
LikeLike
Well crafted …
LikeLike
Well thank you. Well said.
LikeLike
Oh my gosh, so beautiful … there is pain in this. Thanks for sharing 🙂
LikeLike
Thank you. The pain is my pleasure. No really, glad it made you feel the pain within. It.
LikeLike
Hmmm … yes, I’m thinking I could have chosen my words more carefully! :S
LikeLike
sorry, I’m a little slow this week!
awards are in. 🙂
LikeLike
“with bothersome empty words,
and dumbshow deeds
She was sad from birth”
oh this makes my heart ache.
love the single word “dumbshow”
LikeLike
“She was sad from birth” this line just haunts me. Your are an amazing writer I don’t why but dumbshow makes me think “A Clockwork Orange” and I love that
LikeLike
So many good lines and thoughts in this poem! I love it! Good job!
LikeLike
powerful words.
well delivered.
cheers.
🙂
LikeLike
Pain expressed so beautifully it hurts. Well done. I am touched.
LikeLike
Thank you. You’re beautiful and kind. Be well. I truly appreciate your thoughtful comments. Please come around again.
LikeLike
Marvelous! Such powerful words! A hint of hope in the intense negativity! 🙂
LikeLike
How her awkwardness is shown in the last five lines or so instead of stated is artfully done. Alluringly melancholy.
LikeLike
Thank you!:)
Oh, btw, where do pleasant fountains lie?
LikeLike
Lower 😉
LikeLike
🙂 my favourite direction.
LikeLike